Wednesday 30 March 2011

Roz's Story

There are so many people who are desperate for a 'new' life or a different life - here is one way of doing something completely different. Roz was featured on CBC radio last week, and this is her story as posted on You Tube.

"It was the year 2000, I was 33 years old, and I seemed to have the perfect life. I had a job, a husband, a home, a little red sports car. In theory, I should have been happy. Fast forward to March 2006. I am 38, divorced, homeless, and alone in a tiny rowing boat in the middle of the Atlantic Ocean. My last hot meal was two months ago, before my camping stove broke. My stereo is bust. I’ve had no human contact since my satellite phone stopped working several weeks ago. All four of my oars are broken and I’ve had to patch them up with duct tape and makeshift splints. I have tendonitis in my shoulders and saltwater sores on my backside. I have battled twenty-foot waves, sleep deprivation, self-doubt and depression. But I have never been happier. They said I was crazy. They said I wasn’t big enough, not tall enough, not strong enough.
But at last, after three thousand miles and 103 days at sea, I am about to accomplish my goal. I am proving that anybody can achieve the extraordinary, if only they have enough guts and determination and sheer bloody-mindedness to see it through. I am realizing my dream, one stroke at a time.

Obviously I’d made a few changes in my life. You may be wondering why somebody who seemed to have it all would choose to throw it all away. But did I really have it all? I would sit on the commuter train on my way to the office, wondering if this was what life was all about. I wasn’t happy. I wasn’t fulfilled. I wasn’t being true to my values. One day I sat down and wrote two versions of my obituary. The first was the one that I wanted to have. I thought of the obituaries that I enjoyed reading, the people that I admired. They were the adventurers and risk-takers, the people who seemed to have lived many lifetimes in one, the people who had tried lots of things, some of them successes, some of them spectacular failures, but at least they’d had the guts to try. They didn’t give a damn what anybody thought of them; their own opinion of themselves was all that mattered. They lived life with a greediness for new experiences, and gumption, and a gung-ho attitude that defied the attempts of naysayers and nigglers to pigeonhole them or put them down. These people really knew how to live. The second version was the obituary that I was heading for – a conventional, ordinary life – pleasant and with its moments of excitement, but always within the safe confines of normality. The difference between the two was startling. Clearly something was going to have to change. But even then it was an evolution, not a revolution. One by one, I shed the trappings of my old life – the job, the husband, the home, the little red sports car. I moved house with increasing regularity, wherever I could find cheap or preferably free accommodation. I lived in a tiny cabin on a barge on the Thames, then a Dickensian garret in Richmond, then an office in Battersea. Every time I moved house I got rid of more stuff, the stuff that had been weighing me down, the stuff that I had allowed to own me rather than me owing it. I pared life down to the basics to find out what really mattered to me, to find out what was left when I was defined by what I was, not what I owned. Little by little I began to realign my life, to put myself on track for the obituary I really wanted. I learned that living life according to my values made me happier than a big income and lots of possessions. I stopped being a compulsive planner and started taking a more flexible approach to life.
I stopped caring so much about what other people thought of me, and started caring more about what I thought of myself. I accepted that mistakes are a fact of life, an inevitable consequence of being adventurous and trying new things. I realized that it matters less whether something is a success or a failure, and matters more what I learn from the experience. It became clear to me, intellectually and emotionally and intuitively, that we have to look after our planet if we want it to look after us. I felt I was getting a few things figured out. But I was like a carpenter with a brand new set of tools, and no wood to work on. I needed a project. And so I decided to row the Atlantic.

Rowing the Atlantic was, without a doubt, the hardest thing I had ever done. I’d wanted to get out of my comfort zone, and that, by definition, is an uncomfortable place to be. Physically, it was tough, but psychologically it was even tougher. The ocean is scary and it’s daunting and most of the time I wanted to give up. But no matter how hard it got, I always believed that the only thing worse than carrying on would be to quit. I believe that if you don’t keep pushing the boundaries, keep expanding your comfort zone, your comfort zone actually gets smaller and smaller, until you’re shrink-wrapped in such a tiny comfort zone that you can’t move, you can’t achieve anything, you can’t grow. And so I keep pushing, keep developing, keep evolving. I keep showing what an ordinary person can do when they put their hearts and minds and souls into it. That is why, having rowed the Atlantic, I’m taking on the Pacific.

Sunday 27 March 2011

Financial Health

How is your financial health? Is your income adequate to support your existing lifestyle? Your desired lifestyle?

It is fairly easy to establish in a hurry – have a look at your bank balance, do you use overdraft and do you have a balance on your credit card? If you do, ask yourself “why?” The answer is probably that you spend more than you make every month and you have to borrow money from YOUR future to live right now.

Getting spending under control and to decide what you should spend money on is often a struggle for many people. Most of us have everything we need but the problem is that we constantly want more instead of being content with what we have. Why is that?

Alexander Green, author of argueably one of the best books I have ever read, The Secret of Shelter Island says that “reasonable, affordable consumption means less struggle, less debt, less hassles and less stress. It grants us more time – and with it the opportunity for new experiences, better relationships, and greater personal freedom”.

It is easier to spend less than to earn more so as of now I will question every expense carefully. Will the decision to spend add to the quality of my life or will it create more stress?

Plan today to spend NOTHING except for groceries and fuel for your vehicle for the next 7 days and keep track of how you manage. Did it work? Could you delay the spending or did you avoid places that would require money?

Try it for a week and then another, delay spending at all cost for awhile until you get an idea of where the money is going.

Comments?  Contact me at GreaterLivingInstitute@gmail.com

Saturday 26 March 2011

Food Rules

“If it came from a plant, eat it; if it was made in a plant, don’t.”

This week I am reading “Food Rules” by Michael Pollan and I try to keep his simple food rules in mind when I plan the meals for the upcoming week.

Yesterday was one of those text book examples of the perfect dinner at the end of the day. Dinner and dessert was ready in an hour (except for the icing which I will make this morning). Being it was Friday I even picked up a bottle of wine. The family arrived in the kitchen one by one as they started to smell dinner being prepared and sat at the table chatting while I got dinner started. Last night we had Jamie Oliver's chili which is full of vegetables and makes it a very healthy meal. It is not your usual chili recipe due to the amount of vegetables, the combination of spices like cumin, chili and cinnamon and the chick peas which I have tried to hide by calling them pasta. That didn't really work but if your kids are younger you might try to sell them this way. I also made a carrot cake as carrots are cheap and plentiful this time of year.

After having chopped the vegetables and browned the meat, I quickly shredded the carrots for the cake and was ready to place it in the oven in 5 minutes. It is a very fast cake to make and it bakes for 50 minutes, exactly as long as the chili has to cook.

This was done in a hour and was much cheaper than take out/fast food. Cost of the chili is less than $10 and we even have leftovers.

If you would like these and other recipes just e-mail me at greaterlivinginstitute@gmail.com

Today I am making my favorite bread because it seems to be the perfect thing to do on a frosty winter day. This bread does not require a lot of effort, just that you are around for the 4 hours that it takes from beginning until you can eat it. This bread has a secret ingredient and is considered a treat in our house as white bread is usually banished. These golden loaves are beautiful when done and the kids are lined up to have a couple of slices with butter while still warm.

It all starts with a potato which you peel, chop and cook until tender. Save ¾ cup of the cooking water which you will need for the bread. I have never kneaded this by hand and don’t know if you will get the super light and fluffy dough if you don’t use a mixer of some kind.

1 large potato, peeled and chopped
2 tbsp. butter
2 tbsp. sugar
1 tsp. salt
1 cup milk at room temperature
1 package yeast (2 1/4 tsp.)
5 to 5 ½ cup flour

Place the chopped potato in a medium sized pot an cover with water. Bring to a boil and cook until the potatoes are very tender when pierced with a knife. Drain, reserving ¾ cup of the cooking water.

Place the cooked potato in the bowl of a stand mixer and beat until smooth. Stir in the butter, sugar, salt and 2 tbsp. of the milk. Continue to blend until the mixture is completely pureed. Blend in the remaining milk.

Cool the measured cooking water until just warm (105 to 115 degrees F) sprinkle with the yeast and let sit 5 minutes to soften the yeast.

Stir the softened yeast mixture into the potato mixture. Using low speed at first, add 3 cups of the flour until well combined. Increase speed to medium and continue to beat the dough until it is smooth and elastic, approximately 5 minutes. Stir in 1 ½ cup more of the flour to make a soft dough. Continue to blend until the dough is well combined and coming away from the sides of the bowl. Turn the dough onto the counter.

Knead the bread lightly until it is smooth and elastic and not sticking to the surface – the dough should still be a little sticky – don’t use too much flour!

Turn the dough into a large, well greased bowl. Cover with plastic wrap and a dampened cloth on top. Place in a warm and draft-free place until doubled in size (approximately 1 ½ hours). My choice is to turn the oven light on and leave the bread there to rise.

Punch down the dough and divide into two equal portions. For each loaf, gently fold the dough a couple of times and place in well-greased pans. Sprinkle a little of the flour over the loaves.

Return the dough-filled pans to a draft-free place and let rise until almost double in size (about 45 minutes). If you use the oven for this, don't forget to remove the bread before pre-heating the oven!

Preheat the oven to 375 degrees and bake the loaves for 35 minutes until well-browned. They will sound hollow when tapped. Remove loaves from pans and let cool on a wire rack.

Since all of the above items are homemade they do not contain any preservatives or additives and you get to control the amount of salt added.

Tuesday 22 March 2011

Good bye Cam

Today Claresholm will say good bye to a young man who grew up here and died recently in New Zealand. The grief felt by all of his young friends has been quite an eye opener as a lot of these boys have never really dealt with anything like this before. I have watched my son trying to deal with Cam’s death this past week and can already see a difference in him and his attitude to life.

Yesterday we went out to buy him a suit and a tie for the funeral today and as I watch my son all somber and serious, I am again overwhelmed with sadness for Cam’s family. As a parent I am struggling with the urge to protect and discourage my son from doing anything that could cause him harm but also wanting him to experience life in his own way. Bad things happen every day I know, but it sure is different when it happens to someone close to you.

How to keep our loved one’s safe and happy? Do we pray or hope for the best? I think I will do both, just in case.

Cam was 19 years old!

Monday 21 March 2011

Just for Today

Just for today I will be happy.  “Most people are about as happy as they make up their minds to be”.  Happiness is from within; it is not a matter of externals.

Just for today I will try to adjust myself to what is, and not try to adjust everything to my own desires.  I will take my family, my business, and my luck as them come and fit myself to them.  
               
Just for today I will take care of my body.  I will exercise it, care for it, nourish it, not abuse it nor neglect it, so that it will be a perfect machine for my bidding.

Just for today I will try to strengthen my mind.  I will learn something useful.  I will not be a mental loafer.  I will read something that requires effort, thought and concentration.

Just for today I will exercise my soul in three ways:  I will do somebody a good dead and expect nothing in return.  I will do at least two things I don’t want to do, just to get used to it.

Just for today I will be agreeable, I will look as well as I can, dress as nicely as I can, speak calmly and act courteously, be liberal with praise, not be critical and ignoring faults with anything and not try to regulate no improve anyone.

Just for today I will try to live through this day only, not to tackle my whole life problems at once.

Just for today I will have an outline for how the day should unfold.  I will write down what I expect to do.  I will review it by noon to see if I am on track.

Just for today I will have a quiet half hour all by myself and relax.  In this half hour I will praise myself and appreciate what I have.

Just for today I will be unafraid, especially I will not be afraid to be happy, to enjoy what is beautiful, to love, and to believe that those I love, love me.

From the book "How to Stop Worrying and Start Living"" by Dale Carnegie - written in 1944 but still true today.

Any comments?  Contact me at GreaterLivingInstitute@gmail.com

Sunday 20 March 2011

Pretty Healthy?

Describing yourself as 'Pretty Healthy' falls somewhere in between doing absolutely nothing for your health and, on the other side, virtually obsessing about your health.  Just remember that everything and anything that you do counts: that's the point.  Keep trying to find something that works for you and your family.  Think of it as quitting smoking: you wouldn't tell someone who didn't make it the first time to just give up, would you? 
  1. Be a vegetarian until 5 p.m.
  2. Get a massage.
  3. Have a complete check up with your doctor every year.
  4. Know your cholesterol numbers.
  5. Vitamin D - should you take some?
  6. Teach your kids to cook!
  7. Get at least 7 hours of sleep every night this week.
  8. Wear sunscreen every day.
  9. Eat wild salmon this week.
  10. Buy yourself some flowers today.

Add these to the 10 hints from last week and consider this a good beginning.  Contact me at greaterlivinginstitute@gmail.com

Friday 18 March 2011

Do Something

“Midlife is when you reach the top of the ladder and find it’s leaning against the wrong wall”

It’s tragic when someone sacrifices years of his life, his friendships, his family – sometimes even his health – pursuing goals that are ultimately unfulfilling.

Be grateful if you realized this in time to do something about it!  This weekend start moving towards a greater life.  Go to the book store or the library to get books and start researching your area of interest.  Contact  a university or college and at least find out what would be involved in going back to school.  Go look at cheaper/smaller houses and see what’s available in a lower price range.  Go for a drive to a small town if you think that is the lifestyle you would like.  Start a Book of Possibilities like Queen Latifah's character did in the movie Last Holiday where you keep the information you gather and where you can jot down ideas as you get them.  If you want to start your own business, make sure you have a business plan in as much detail as possible.  Go to a travel agency and pick up brochures if a trip is high on your list of priorities.   Cook something this week-end and count your blessings!

Here are some great jobs that are currently available in Claresholm:
 Any comments, contact me at GreaterLivingInstitute@gmail.com

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Thursday 17 March 2011

So far so good!

I have not exactly been sitting on the couch since my boat burning incident three weeks ago.

I have been busy worrying about family friends who are now hostages in Somalia and trying not to imagine what could happen to them if the ransom demands are not met.

Kevin and I have also been supporting our oldest son who is grieving for his 19 year old friend who died last week in New Zealand in a car accident.  My husband and I could not help thinking how this could have been one of ours!  How quickly your perfect world can be completely destroyed by a phone call!   This is our son’s first brush with death and he is having a hard time dealing with it.  He now spends a lot of time with his friends and he has also reached out to friends he has not seen in awhile.

This week I finally rented the last unit in the 8-plex we own half of but are somehow fully responsible for.   Part of the roof blew off during a windstorm on Monday which now means I will be dealing with the insurance company.  I have decided to put the apartment building up for sale, first one with a cheque for $575,000 takes it.

I am also trying to sell an industrial building that we are part owners of and dealing with three other rental properties - feel free to contact me if you are thinking of becoming a landlord, I have lots of experience, both very good and very bad.

I have managed to apply for a couple of jobs and I have also baked a lot of bread.  Note to potential employer, don’t worry about me being too busy for that great job I am looking for.  I am working on simplifying my life and will be ready very soon.

I am also still on the Economic Development Committee for Claresholm even though I technically do not qualify after having resigned from my job.

Trying to follow my own 10 rules (as posted in the blog titled "It all adds up") which means I read a lot more (#3) as I am having trouble with #5.

We have watched a lot of basketball the last 3 weeks as it was the end of the season and our youngest son’s team made it to Zones.  It also resulted in him being invited to play for a Lethbridge team which he is considering.

I am still mending my broken heart after leaving the retirement home, I have never made 45 friends so quickly in my life. 

Today I have to finish photo copying two pounds of documents in support of my Canadian Citizenship application which is due Friday.    

Going to bake another loaf of bread now!

Any comments?  Contact me at GreaterLivingInstitute@gmail.com




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Wednesday 16 March 2011

Show the Love

"Coming home from work - the first thing we do is find each other in the house and give each other a greeting as though we hadn't seen each other in days.  No matter what life threw us today, we're now home and safe in the presence of someone who loves us."  Make this a habit every day.

Absolutely everyhing we have in our lives is by choice, including happiness.

From the book "Paving It Forward" by Elisabeth Fayt

If you have any comments, please contact me at GreaterLivingInstitute@gmail.com

Tuesday 15 March 2011

Affluenza anyone?

“Affluenza is a painful, contagious, socially-transmitted condition of overload, debt, anxiety and waste resulting from the dogged pursuit of more”.  Too many of us are working ourselves to death to accumulate an endless array of goods and services we don’t really need.

Reasonable, affordable consumption means less struggle, less debt, less hassles, less stress.  It also grants us more time – and with it the opportunity for new experiences, better relationships, and greater personal freedom.

From the book The Secret of Shelter Island by Alexander Green which is definitely the best book I have read in a very long time. 

If you have any comments, contact me at GreaterLivingInstitute@gmail.com


Monday 14 March 2011

The Power of Now

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Spiritual author Eckhart Tolle wrote that when people realized that he was a happy and contented person they would come up to him and say:  “I want what you have.  Can you give it to me, or show me how to get it?” and he would say “You have it already.  You just can’t feel it because your mind is making too much noise.”  How profound is that?  Read more for yourself from his book "The Power of Now".

Why would you need a stranger to point out all the 'good stuff' that you have achieved and have going on in your life?  Try LOVING where you are now.

Do you find yourself dreaming or wishing for things you don’t have: A bigger or nicer house or is the one you are currently living in good enough?  Do you wish for a new car or new furniture?  All these things require money and money is what we trade our time for.  If you have a job you trade your time on this earth for money.  If you stop working then the money stops too.

Focus on learning to be content with what you have and don't always wish for more.
I welcome your comments at greaterlearninginstitute@gmail.com

 

Sunday 13 March 2011

It All Adds Up

“If you don’t take time for your health now, you will have to take time to be sick later”

Everything counts, start with these 10 ideas and add ten new ones every week. 
  1. Weight yourself today – write down the number and don’t allow yourself to get heavier!
  2. Take a multi vitamin every day
  3. Read a book this week
  4. Drink green tea every day
  5. Don’t watch TV for any longer than you exercised today
  6. Love Your Tribe – make family a high priority
  7. Drink a glass of tomato juice everyday  – it prevents wrinkles!
  8. Go for a walk everyday regardless of the weather
  9. Eat a banana every day
  10. Learn to bake bread
Let me know how you did with these suggestions.  Please contact me at greaterlivinginstitute@gmail.com

Saturday 12 March 2011

Suggested Reading

I am reading The Voyage of the Northern Magic by Diane Stuemer -  again.  Whenever I think of an adventure I think of this family who sailed around the world for four years with their young family.  Diane and her husband had a ‘wake up’ call in their late thirties and decided that they had to do something different with their lives.  Within a year they had sold their business, rented their house and bought a boat that they learned to sail on the Ottawa river! 

Being stuck on a boat in such close proximity with my family is not something that I would do but I have thought of the story many times during the last several years.   This is an average Canadian family who did something that anyone could do if they wanted to.  What would an adventure be for you?  Moving to Qatar for four years which my sister’s friend in Okotoks just did with her family?  What these families are doing is BUILDING MEMORIES, they are daring to do something completely different for awhile. 

Here is a humorous quote from the retirement home, posted in the lounge where we had happy hour twice a week:

“The Secret to a Long Life?
1.       Never travel to any place you haven’t been before
2.       Never stay up past 8 p.m.
3.       Always go to bed alone,
4.       Never drink another Martini.
Follow these simple rules and you still may not live forever…but it’ll sure seem like forever.”

Why I Love This Small Town

I know that you can’t all move to Claresholm and that is too bad.  There are so many benefits to living in a small town.  Here are seven good reasons that I can think of right now.

  1. You will know all the kids that are your own children’s age and who their families are.  In a small town there is only one elementary school, one middle school and one high school and when you go there you will meet the kids and their friends which is a good thing.
  2. You can get anywhere in town in 5 minutes or less.  The grocery store, the bank and the drug store – all are almost within walking distance.
  3. You will always meet someone you know when you go ‘downtown’, it is a comfortable feeling knowing the people in your community and to be known by them.
  4. There is no crazy traffic, only one set of lights (and it seems to be most often green in my direction).  Although there is quite a traffic jam at the post office around noon it is only for an hour or so.
  5. It is always quiet after 10 p.m.
  6. If you are lucky enough to work in town your commute is over before the hourly news bulletin is.
  7. Where else can you live on the golf course for $375,000.00?
The point is for you to start contemplating living a simpler and slower life if this is what you think you want.  Smaller houses will do just fine as kids can share a room which they did years ago without doing permanent damage.  Europeans have much smaller houses and often the children have to share a room.  Resist that urge to ‘move up’ or to ‘keep up with the Jones’; stay where you are or move into a smaller or cheaper home.  Perhaps even in a less expensive neighborhood.  Something has to give.

To live more cheaply and to spend less means that maybe one person can quit their job or can work less for awhile.  This is a valuable goal and would be a marker on the road to a simpler lifestyle.

Start by SPENDING LESS – the first step is to reduce debt and money needed for living every month.  In order for you to be able to do whatever it is you want: to quit work; to relocate; to go back to school; to  travel – you will need money.  If you had to cut back drastically, what expenses could you eliminate?

Here is the budget for Vivienne and Robert who used the equity in their home to finance a new career path for Robert.  They sold their home in Discovery Ridge in Calgary and bought a house for $375,000.00.  This left them with a mortgage payment of $1500 per month which they felt they could manage on Vivienne’s wage as a full time teacher in an elementary school.  Robert went back to school to get a teaching degree at age 37 as he had finally figured out that he wanted to work with people instead of numbers.  


ItemAmountComment
Mortgage Payment $ 1,500.00
Property Tax $    300.00
Utilities $    400.00
Phone $    100.00
Misc $    400.00  Toiletries, paper, Pet food
Food $    600.00  Family of four
House Ins. $    100.00
Gasoline $    200.00
Car Ins. $    160.00
Car Maint. $    100.00
Savings $    200.00
Gifts $    100.00
Entertainment $    100.00
RESP for 2 kids $    100.00  2 kids x $50
Clothing - Shoes $    200.00
Kids Activities $    100.00
 $ 4,660.00


As you can see this is a very basic budget.  Compare it to your existing budget and have a look at what you would be willing to give up or delay purchasing.  This should not be a sacrifice for you: it should be an easy choice on your journey to a simpler lifestyle and should generate a huge sigh of relief.

This couple realizes that they may not be able to do this without incurring some extra debt during Robert’s studies but they feel they should be able to pay it off within one year once he starts working.

Vivienne’s parents were so proud of them and helped wherever they could with babysitting and would usually drop off a prepared meal during the week.   Robert’s parents helped them paint the interior of the house and gave them hardwood floors for Christmas which they installed with the help of a friend.   Vivienne and Robert did not feel deprived and gratefully accepted their parents help at this time.   

With both Vivienne and Robert being teachers and having the summer months off they plan on spending two months every year in Italy in a rented house.  This is a huge priority for them as this is something they want to be able to do as a family while the children are still young.

The Best Year Ever!

How do you do that?  You start with planning and more planning.  The more detailed your plan is the more likely it is that it will happen.  Try doing just one year at a time and plan that year in as much detail as you can.  The more time you spend on this project the more likely it is to happen. 
What do you want more of?  What are the things you want to do?  Write it down!  We cannot accomplish much without a plan!  Think of it like building a house: you first draw up a plan, get quotes, finalize details and then you start to build.
I quit my job which may not have been the smartest thing to do but it was the largest obstacle to everything in my life and I will deal with it somehow.  I need more time to take care of my family, plain and simple.  I have two teenagers at home who do not actually require a lot of time or supervision but that is not my point.  This time right now is precious to ME.  My middle son graduates in June and will be moving out.  I want to have the time to spend with him, to listen to him and to focus on him with my attention.  He is not going to want to sit and visit with me all day but I am going to be available.
Since my husband works out of town for a week at the time I want to be here when he is home so we can spend some quality time together.  He is the greatest guy in the world!
My daughter goes to University in Lethbridge and usually comes home every second weekend when her Dad is here so I am going to go to visit her the week that she does not come home.  She is working hard and I am going to be available to her and to support her.
My youngest son is still at home and is an easy-going guy who is always hungry.  I will cook and bake for him and he is always bringing friends home who are equally hungry.  I hope he will have fond memories of his teenage years with few responsibilities and a happy Mom.
My parents are in their seventies and still in reasonably good health.  I am going to take the time to spend with them now before it is too late.  I will visit them weekly and offer to help them with chores or just have coffee.  I will be patient and grateful to still have both of them in my life.
I have two sisters and a brother who I will visit or call on a regular basis.  I enjoy spending time with all of them but they are busy too and I will be the one to make the relationships better.
I have wonderful friends that I will commit to get together with at least once a month.  We email often just to keep in touch but this year I will make the effort to see them more.  I will suggest and plan getting together since I have the time for the next year.
May 1st this year I will start to take golf lessons.  I have resisted learning to golf for years as I really didn’t think it was my kind of thing but I can see the benefits now.  It gets me outside in the summer doing something with other people.  It is a game that can be done anywhere in the world and it is a great thing to do with a spouse, kids or friends which takes several hours.  I will give it an honest try this year.
I am going to plan another party this summer for my family and friends and this year we will invite them to set up tents in the back yard.  This will be our second annual golf tournament and BBQ.  I will cook breakfast the next morning for everyone.  Hopefully this will be a new family tradition for us.



Kevin and I both love to travel but this requires money that we really don’t have right now.  Since we do agree that it is a high priority, we had to figure out a way to still travel, but for less money.  The solution became to join my parents on a trip to Europe and cost share the expenses.  My parents are not comfortable travelling alone anymore anyway.  Kevin and I are traveling on points and we will be joining my parents in their rented house.  We will contribute the food and we are only staying for 12 days of the total 22 days that my parents are staying.  We fly in close to the rented house and will travel about on the train system.  No need for expensive rental cars or fuel.
This year Kevin and I will spend time going to Farmer’s Markets and we will cook more together.  We will be going for day trips during the week to Waterton National Park with a picnic and to Kananaskis Provincial Park for lunch and a hike (which is actually what we did a lot of when we were dating many years ago.)  We will be home evenings and week-ends for the kids, have dinner on the deck and just be together.
I will be diligent in spending as little money as possible and I will question every expense that could be avoided to ease the strain on our finances.  I will continue to look for work that fits with our family’s needs.
This is the plan for the next 12 months which is mostly about time and people.  Since I don’t know how much I will earn this year, I will have to spend less to make this work. 
Tell me how you would make this year THE BEST ONE EVER!
Contact me at greaterlivinginstitute@gmail.com with your comments.

Leave The City Behind

I received an email from Laura who wanted to share with me how their family had changed their life.

It was a very practical solution that Laura and Brian came up with.  They sat down and while they talked about what they wanted in life they actually drew a picture of the life that they had envisioned: a life away from the city and the hectic schedule of everyday.  They lived in Calgary and had always wanted to live in the country but acreages close to Calgary were not possible due to price and if they moved too far away from Calgary commuting would be an issue. 

Brian worked as an IT analyst and Laura worked as an accountant in a large firm.  Neither one of them had particularly satisfying jobs but they were comfortable with the work routine.  They had lived in their house in Calgary for six years and figured out that if they sold it today they would clear $115,000.00 cash equity.  They had a car loan with an outstanding balance of $5,000.00 and a credit card balance of $10,000.00.

They had three kids, ages 4, 6 and 8.  Brian’s friend Jason told him about his work in Fort McMurray and how he had changed his life by deciding to ‘work to live’ and not live to just work.  He had signed up for a six-week oilfield course to get the necessary safety certifications at a cost of $499.00.  He also bought driving lessons  to obtain an commercial driving license for heavy trucks for $1500.00.  After completing the courses Brian secured a job in the oilfield earning $25 per hour, living in camp in Bonnyville, AB, working 14/7 - fourteen days on and then home for seven days.  Including overtime he is now earning $90,000.00 for his first year in the oilfield.

They started to research communities in other parts of Alberta as they could now live anywhere because Laura did not have to work anymore.  They chose Claresholm an hour and fifteen minutes south of Calgary.   It is a small town in a rural setting with a hospital and several other health care facilities.

They bought a small ranch for $415,000.00 just ten minutes from town, put $80,000.00 down and have mortgage payments of $1200.00 per month.  They paid off their credit card and the remainder of their car loan.

Laura is at home, loving their new life in the country.  She sees nothing but fields and trees when she looks out the windows and she is still only 10 minutes away from the children’s school.   She has a garden, helps out at the school and when Brian is home they spend lots of time together or working on their many projects they now have time for.  They go for walks, renovate their house and go for picnics in the country with the girls.  They installed a wood burning stove and Kevin bought a wood splitter he shares with his neighbor.  Every fall they go into the back country and take as much wood as they want for the price of a $10.00 permit.

Brian does the oilfield away-from-home thing for his family. “Work is work” he says and he lives for the times when he is home and he then spends all his time with the family.  Laura is grateful for this opportunity to stay at home and look after the children.   Laura could get a job in any of the health facilities as a health care aide, working casual shifts.  “Maybe later” she said, for now she is very happy with having the time for her family.  They also see a lot more of their extended family and their friends as they often come down and stay for the week-end, camping on the 160 acres surrounding the house.

I am not saying that everybody can do this, abandon careers and move to the country, but many could.  The future of the oil industry looks promising right now but that could change.  Being prepared for change and needing less to live on every day makes the difference.  They do have a backup plan for Laura to get employment and with their low living expenses.   Brian would then not have to make as much for them to live on.  They are setting money aside for retirement right now but know they can continue this lifestyle even with his loss of a high paying job.

You can contact me at this email link: greaterlivinginstitute@gmail.com

Bring Back Sunday Dinner!

With our busy lives, some days it feels like we spend less and less time preparing meals and sitting down to eat together.   Some of our most memorable family get togethers are centred around food and eating.  I want to teach our kids that there is more to a HOME than its location and the stuff inside.  A home can be anywhere, it is what you do there that counts.  Hopefully, down the road, our kids will remember these times and when they create their own families, a renewed tradition will develop.

Whether or not you can actually cook is not important.  If you can read you can follow a recipe and with practice you will get better.  It is about the anticipation of a meal, the smells and the fact that so much preparation was put into something.  It is not just about the food.

Start out simple and prepare something that is fairly easy and as you get more comfortable you can try new recipes and be a bit more daring.  It is a great thing for a couple to do together as you can talk or listen to music while you work.  Jamie Oliver is a huge believer in good food, health and spending time with family.  If you have to watch tv, watch a cooking show, you will always learn something or be inspired.

My parents live an hour away and I invite them every second Sunday for dinner and a game of cards.  They stay over in our son’s room while he sleeps on the couch for the night.  This is now a new tradition and the fact that my mom always leaves $10 on his dresser to pay him for the inconvenience is fine with him too.  

I will plan the Sunday meal during the week and if I need something special Kevin and I will go shopping together on these occasions.  It is a lot of fun and a trip to the Italian Deli is a perfect date.   Sometimes I will pick a theme or most often cook according to the season.  I picked up a wonderful local cookbook called The Alberta Seasonal Cookbook of which I have tried several recipes.  Once I try a recipe I always write a rating on the page and this has been helpful in deciding if I should try other recipes from the same cook book.  I can highly recommend the Potato and Roasted Garlic Chowder, it was wonderful and our company loved it!

I follow Julie van Rosendaal’s blog Dinner With Julie and her recipes are easy and delicious.  She has been blogging for several years now and you can find all of her recipes on her website.  Try to read her blog for awhile and you will learn a lot about food and Julie.  Here is someone who seems to have figured out the perfect balance between work and family and you will be inspired to cook.  Some of my favourites are slow cooker pulled pork, Jamie’s chili, faster-than-fast-food salmon and rain forest crisps.

Here is a great way of saying “I love you” to the kids – a chocolate cake for them ‘just because’ and it is always a hit.  It takes longer to heat up the oven than to mix together the ingredients!
Terrific Chocolate Cake:


1 ½ cup all purpose flour
1 cup sugar
¼ unsweetened cocoa powder
1 tsp. baking soda
½ tsp. salt
6 tbsp. canola oil
1 tbsp. white vinegar
1 tsp. pure vanilla extract
1 cup cool water

Icing:

¼ butter, at room temperature
2 cups icing sugar
2 – 3 tbsp. milk or water
1 ½ tbsp. unsweetened cocoa powder
1 tsp. pure vanilla extract

Pre-heat oven to 350 degrees.  Spray a round cake pan with Pam and sprinkle with flour.

In a bowl sift flour, sugar, cocoa, baking soda and salt.  Stir briefly to mix.  Make 3 separate areas in the flour for the oil, vinegar and vanilla.  Put in the water and stir a few times to mix.  That’s it, pour into prepared cake pan and bake for 30 minutes in the middle of the oven.  The cake is done when the top feels springy when lightly touched.  Transfer to a wire rack and cool complete before taking it out of the pan.

In a bowl cream together the butter and 1 cup of icing sugar until the butter is well disturbed.  The mixture will be very dry and powdery.  Stir in 1 tablespoon  of milk or water and then add the cocoa powder and blend.  Mix in the vanilla and then add the second cup of icing sugar.  Add as much of the remaining liquid as necessary to make a thick, creamy icing.  Sprinkle with whatever topping you like.


You can contact me at this email link: greaterlivinginstitute@gmail.com

Retirement Home Lessons

If you ever want a different perspective on things in your life, go visit a retirement home!   Here you will quickly realize that you already have the most enviable thing possible and that is T-I-M-E. 

“Money is replaceable and time isn’t, hence time is more valuable” – just ask a senior - what do you do with all that money when you get old?  You can buy a nice place to live with people who can help you but you really don’t need that much money because you probably can’t do the things you could earlier. 
After getting to know many of the residents and hearing their stories I soon realized that the residents could be placed into two separate groups.  The first group is mostly happy and content as they have lived a good life and at this point, the retirement home is fine.  They live on their memories and can spend hours looking a photos and telling stories about their adventures.   The other group is the unhappy group, they have many regrets and are often angry and resentful - realizing that at this stage it is too late to make changes. Every day when I left work I would think about how I would want to feel about life if I lived to the age of 88.  I want to live a life with lots of experiences, lots of laughs and lots of love – this is what will sustain us later in life when things slow down.

I also realized that for the residents who did not have many visitors that it was not necessarily the family or their friends fault.  If you have spent too much time working and not playing and building friendships nothing magical is going to happen when you get old.  If you have distant relationships with your family this is not suddenly going to change for the better when you get old.  You reap what you sow in your life time, especially when you get old.

Here are some lessons I learned awhile ago, think about it and ask yourself if you do this:

  • If you want to HAVE a happy marriage you have to BE the kind of person who generates positive energy and laughter.  Be supportive, interested and giving of your time and affection.

  • If you want to HAVE a more pleasant, cooperative teenager, BE a more understanding, empathic, consistent, loving parent.

  • If you want to HAVE more freedom, more latitude in your job, BE a more responsible, a more helpful, a more contributing employee.

  • If you want to BE trusted, BE trust-worthy.

  • If you want to BE loved, BE loving.

  • If you want to BE rich, BE careful with spending money.

I tried to evaluate myself and asked myself the questions from above.  Am I a good spouse?  Do I show love every day?  Do I speak of Kevin lovingly and respectfully?  Do I get the same back from him?

First, give what you want to receive, it's as easy as that.

You can contact me at this email link: greaterlivinginstitute@gmail.com

It's Later Than You Think

My road trip to a greater life has finally started and you are welcome to come along.  Elusive as it seems to have been, I am finally ready for this trip.

I have just had the privilege of working in a retirement home for the last nine months and I have been given these amazing life lessons that I am now eager to share with anyone who will listen.  I feel so lucky to have been given this wakeup call at this time in my life where I still have time to realize many of the things that I have been wondering about.  Since I plan on living to the ripe old age of 88, I am now exactly halfway there.

My husband and I recently verbalized to each other how unhappy we have been with the way that we have been living our lives and we often ask ourselves “is this all there is?”  We both have jobs, we have three wonderful children and a lovely house but there seem to be something missing.  Life seems to be mostly about responsibilities and a bit short on FUN. I have now decided to take a more active role in getting as much out of life as I possibly can for right now and also keeping in mind that if I am going to live to 88 that I need to include that in the plan.   

I asked myself two important questions, first “if this year was my last, what would I regret the most?” and secondly “what can we do to change things so that we become happier”.  (Check out this musical commentary of If Tonight Is My Last from Laura Izibor.  Amazing song!)

If this year was my last year of life, I would regret that I didn’t get to spend more quality time with Kevin and our kids.  I would regret that I spent too much time at work for too little pay.  That I didn’t learn to golf, that I didn’t get to Italy, that we didn’t have a huge garden party in the summer for family and friends  and that I didn’t realize my goal of losing the thirty pounds that I have been dragging around for the last 10 years.

Nothing too earth shattering here, no hiking trip to Machu Picchu, no winning the lottery or bungee jumping, just stuff that means a lot to me and that is very obtainable. 

To change things would mean to change the way we live.  We are often trapped by high overhead and debt which means we have to earn more and more in order to just stay the same.  Well, if things are to change we need to free up cash and for most people that means accessing the equity in their home or spending less.
The first thing I did was to quit my job.  Yes, last week I quit my job and I feel pretty good so far.  A bit scared too but I have decided to do what the general in Napoleon Hill’s classic Think And Grow Rich did:


“A long while ago, a great warrior faced a situation which made it necessary for him to make a decision which insured his success on the battlefield. He was about to send his armies against a powerful foe, whose men outnumbered his own. He loaded his soldiers into boats, sailed to the enemy’s country, unloaded soldiers and equipment, then gave the order to burn the ships that had carried them. Addressing the men before the first battle, he said, “You see the boats going up in smoke?  That means that we cannot leave these shores unless we win! We now have no choice—we win—or we perish!”


What happened?


They Won.


Hill: “Every person who wins in any undertaking must be willing to burn his ships and cut all sources of retreat. Only by so doing can one be sure of maintaining that state of mind known as a burning desire to win, essential to success.”


So that is what I have done.  I was a very good employee and I worked hard which meant I spent a lot of time at work or that I was at home thinking about work.  As circumstances at work became more challenging I felt that I had to leave that negative environment and try to find something better. 

The effect of me quitting my job will be felt instantly as we have acquired a lot of debt and are currently subsidizing several pieces of real estate.  BUT within these houses lies an opportunity to change the way we live.  We can stop this vicious circle IF we want to by either selling our home or by cashing in on something to reduce the amount of money we need every month to LIVE.

Now that I have established what I would regret if this was my last year, I also have to consider the possibility that I will live to the ripe old age of 88 which is my target.  The challenge is to live TODAY and plan to live TOMORROW.

So now it is your turn, to think about what you have and what you want.  What works in your life and what doesn’t work?  Write to me about your life and your dreams and let’s start a dialogue and maybe we can help each other.  I will keep you posted on my own results.

You can contact me at this email link: greaterlivinginstitute@gmail.com